A moment in Forgiveness

We all want a little less darkness in the world.

But why do we keep embracing things that brings us darkness?

To be proud of the things that we ought to be ashamed of, to give in to our fears, to select the easy way out?

The way in which we perceive our lives are such that it is no longer worth doing what is right most of the time.

And what is deemed to be right is slowly being warped. In time we will all forget what is right in the first place.

But yeah, it is a must to accept imperfections in life, to work within these constraints, and to bring the most light out of this world.

We may ponder at these imperfections, but we must never be broken by them.

The same goes for how we perceive people.

Is it really difficult to forgive a truly repentant person?

The same reasoning can be applied here, that it is a must to accept the imperfections in people, to work with them and to see the best out of them.

It is difficult to appreciate everyone, but make no mistake, there is a good and useful purpose in everyone.

It is just our emotions and our inherent faults that compel us to make decisions that veer us towards the wrong.

That is the current limit of my understanding.

But how do you resolve forgiveness with a person when the past weighs ever so heavily upon your mind?

What exactly is the nature of that weight?

Is it because certain deeds committed in the past have yet to be answered in full, such that its original costs may be justified one way or another and be freed?

Or is it that the pains of certain wounds have yet to wear off, and that the newly grown skin over them have yet to mature?

Or perhaps it is that the new system what was built to adapt to this new reality have yet to be ironed out of all its faults?

It is easy to accept forgiveness. It is an absolute value, intended to be warm and light embracing.

But for me, perhaps that will come later.

Forgiveness will take some time to sink in, just as how a viscous liquid will slowly make its way into a complex sponge.

The truth, revelation and forgiveness themselves are comforting. Like all truth it must be taken into account. But the process of substituting them into what is currently understood will take some time.

Old, painful and dark events will have to be torn from their comfortable roots, reviewed in this new understanding again and with it, old chapters be re-written again.

The pain that was buried along with them may have to resurface. The darkness that went to the ground with them may have to cast its cold again.

It will be a costly process, mauled with occasional periods of gloom.

But it is all worth it, for an event so important, with so many lessons derived from it.

And then comes the question of what goes on from here?

I dare not think or dream about its consequences. For things like these are generally beyond my comprehension. It is best, like all things, to leave the future to the Lord.

For now my job is, as always, to understand the world.

And this is just one part of the things that I must understand.

The pain, costs and darkness that we all see must come. It cannot be avoided, just like how one must spend effort before food is brought unto the table.

But always root yourself in light and truth, with rightful intentions, and not be swept away by the easy but dark ways of pain.

Because pain is brought to us by the light to strengthen us, so that we may eventually see more of the light and bring it to others who have less than us.

And when one day the necessity of events compel me to, I must apply what I have learnt to effectively complete what must be done.

Things are a lot easier than how it was when things first collapsed.

There is now greater understanding, more flexibility in the system and more resources to deal with these new facts.

And there is hope, for the better and wiser future ahead.

I have learnt to calm down and work with peace. The only real thing that threatens me is to consider things without these two things again.

It has always not be easy, when it comes to this matter. But that does not mean it cannot be done.

Give me time, and I will be fine again.

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It is comforting to know you have learnt to forgive, and given deep thought into what has passed.

For what the world needs is more forgiveness, more thought and more appreciation of what we have.

The past affects you as much as it has for me, albeit in a very different and less comprehensible way than mine.

Nonetheless, it is always a joy to see that there is more understanding and light in your world, and you have grown a lot wiser for what is to come.

The pain, sorrow and effort is all part of growing up. We must not shun them, for this is what we must do.

I am happy that things may become easier for you from now on, and that perhaps certain things going on within you may be made simpler for you to understand.

What goes on from here, nobody knows. It is too early to dream or to will.

We may not always get to where we want, but there will always be something for us wherever we may end up.

What has passed has passed, but what it has brought us still remains.

And it will be some time before things become clear again.